I’m on an actual Star Wars sand speeder, something I’ve dreamed of doing since I was 5 wearing my pajamas and smuggling grape sodas under the covers with me at night.
Star Tours
This flight simulator is supposed
to be the ultimate Star Wars thrill ride. It wasn’t.
Afterwards I was expecting to feel like I’d just traversed the galaxy like
Han Solo and Luke Skywalker; instead, I just felt nauseas. You’re
basically seated uncomfortably close to some other strangers, where you
then experience the illusion of flying through space. I wanted to
feel like an adventurer, and tried to get into it, but it’s just not that
good.
Here are some photos from the interior while waiting in line. These are actually more notable than the ride itself.
C-3PO was always one of my favorite
characters. Here he looks interested in hacking the planet, like
those guys in Hackers, just minus the expository dialogue and dance
music.
Overall Grade: C
I don’t think this had any particular purpose, but it still looked really cool. I wonder how many Micro Machines you could fit inside that hat?
Voyage of The Little Mermaid
Amanda is absolutely obsessed
with The Little Mermaid and always has been. She’d actually
seen this one before, a couple years prior, and insisted on going again.
It’s a live theatre show, that’s “under the sea”, or at least gives the
illusion of being so. It’s aimed at little ones, and fans of the
film, but is still worth taking in. Being in the refreshingly cool
and dark theatre, I actually was trying to fight off sleep after such a
rigorous day. The show features laser lights, puppets, and live actors.
Grade: B
The Disney-MGM Studios Backlot
Tour
Although it got mostly unfavorable
reviews from what I’d read and heard, being a film fan, I was still interested
in seeing this. At first, while waiting in line for the main attraction,
there’s a small special effects demonstration using audience members.
I’ve shared some pictures from it below. The ride itself is a leisurely
moving bus ride where a host will take you by the studios where they do
some filming, both on sitcoms and movies, and then through the “junkyard”
of movie props. The highlight of this was an old car used in Dick
Tracy, and both Steve Zissou’s helicopter and yellow submarine from
the terrific film The Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou. There
was another portion of the tour, where the bus gets awfully close to a
set where a stunt is taking place, titled Catastrophe Canyon; it’s passable,
if you enjoy hundreds of gallons of water and fireballs shooting at your
face, which I sort of do. Overall, though, it was a bit disappointing.
I wanted to see more, more of everything, but ultimately it’s a pretty
limited tour.
Grade: C+
Get ready… get set…
Get wet!
This is your brain.
This is your brain on Disney.
This section was accessible after the tour itself, and was titled the AFI Showcase. And when I say AFI, I’m talking about the American Film Institute, not the bad experimental goth punk band. Anyway, we were in a rush, so we didn’t say here for too long—but I did see some pretty damn neat stuff. On the far left, we see two outfits worth by villains from Superman II, before they were vanquished forever to the Forbidden Zone by the Man of Steel himself. In the middle, a collection of props from Batman films, including the shirt Tommy Lee Jones wore in the role of Two-Face in Batman Forever. On the right, this little guy is one of Oswald Cobblepot’s (The Penguin) creations, from the rad flick Batman Returns.
I’m not sure who the guy on the left is, I think he’s from Weekend at Bernie's or something, but I’m not certain. In the middle, behold the wicked witch’s actual hat from The Wizard of Oz. Lastly, that’s me posing by props from The Planet of the Apes, one of my all-time favorite sci-fi series’. I own the complete collection on DVD, and it’s interesting to see how these films got progressively weirder as the series progressed—and I won’t even get into the short-lived animated series.
Apparently this fountain is from the mermaid movie Splash, which I somewhat remember—I think I recall Tom Hanks dancing on this giant electronic keyboard. Wait, no that was in the film Big. Well, never mind, just take my word for it!