"Hello, Martin Blank, I sell couch insurance....and I'd blow your head off if someone paid me enough."
It's all about presentation:

Amongst the hustle and bustle of your busy weekly rituals, the driving to and from work in traffic completely made up of dumber people than you, parking, the long, monotonous hours of sitting at your desk and doing the same things over and over again, the getting home to clean up, shower, shave, fix dinner, get to see your baby for what only seems a fleeting moment, feed them twice, change their diaper, get them ready for bed and then get ready to do it all over again, you watch a film that feels as worn out and tired and in the dregs as much as you do, but it's funny.  That film is ( 12 ) Grosse Pointe Blank(not sure why it's spelled like that).  This is some classic John Cusack playing his richly donned like a mortician hitman who breathes the part in this.  He was the guy who didn't care about anything for so long but his 10 year high school reunion (does anyone actually go to those things?) is coming up and his sweet secretary with the dinosaur voice (played by his sister Joan) convinces him to go and enjoy it, along with a bumbled kill that threatens his life if he doesn't make amends.  His psychiatrist at gunpoint (Alan Arkin) seems as if he needs his own head doctor, he's so unnerved and on edge he's like a Woody Allen-lite.  Then, you have arch-nemesis Danny Aykroyd (such a strange casting choice, but it oddly works) who lives in an assassination vacuum and only wants to do two things in life: get fat by eating greasy food and kill for money.  And finally, Minnie Driver plays his long lost love who is still in his home town, divorced, radio disc jockey and practically begging for a life change.  All this characterization comes out in the strange, quirky dialogue and awkward movements of each character and somehow, in the middle of this strangely drab, murderous, downer of a film, it's f***ing hilarious!  This is a big A.  Definitley rent this if you haven't seen it because it's damn worth it.  There are no special features on this edition (boo-hoo) but for me the film is strong enough on it's own as a purchase and the soundtrack is pretty eclectic and kickass- you have the Violent Femmes and G n' R on the same soundtrack you're doing something right and you can't let go of the 80's (hence the theme of Driver's all 80's, all weekend reunion rotation.) Popcorn!

Okay, let's jump (13 ) Into the Blue (what a horrible segue.)  This was one of those bargain bin pickups that were like 3.99 and you figure, this would be an okay way to kill 2 hours or so.  So, I killed those 2 hours with a film that has some action, some romance, and some thriller elements all based on a tropical island where Paul Walker lives, not working a 9-5 day job, on a beach, with Jessica Alba who's barely clothed throughout, so why the hell is he acting all down in the beginning of the flick?  Does he know he's living half of the men on this earth's idea of a pretty damn good life?  Anyways, he wants "something better" as he looks off into the distance while Alba looks on, ready to make out with him.  She states not so plainly in the documentary that she looks forward to those intimate scenes and you could tell because there are quite a lot of them but they do have a chemistry because they seem familiar with each other.  Anyways, enter asshole friend Scott Caan, who seems to play this cocky character almost all the time, with devious and sexual girlfriend for a visit.  Well, while diving and playing other assorted water games, they stumble upon a ship, an ancient ship that Walker and Alba quickly spout off the history of with treasure inside.  They also find a shipwrecked plane with loads and loads of cocaine in it.  They then get tangled into a big web of drug dealers and the police and the locals and who can you trust?  Dun-dun-dunnnnn.  You've seen it all before and the plot tends to get real boring after a while, so you look for other things to keep you interested:  here are my favorite 3 moments (in reverse order):

3) While fighting over whether or not they should get rid of the cocaine, Caan's girlfriend struggles to keep it while Alba takes it away from her, calling her "a coke whore."  The coke whore's response is a simple shoulder shrug.

2) while everyone is swimming, there's this massive close up of Alba's nearly bare ass in a bikini and my god, I never wished for an HDTV more

3) SPOILER ALERT!  SPOILER ALERT!

coke whore dies in the film after getting bitten by a shark (what beach movie doesn't have this scene?) the 3 remaining leads leave the hospital in a pickup truck when Scott Caan says they should get back to the treasure site.  Alba immediately retorts "Your girlfriend was just killed and all you can think about is treasure."  His quick witted response is "I only knew her for 5 days!"
you can't dream up dialogue like that.

Anyways, this is true popcorn flick stuff that gets a little outrageous but is completely harmless. I'd give it a C.  The making of feature is only about 15 minutes and shows nothing of the plot but mainly talks about how much everyone likes hanging out since it is a predominantly young cast.  The director talks about being happy that all the stars are completely comfortable in their own skin and like to show off their sexy.  Josh Brolin is a co star here and gives some quick candid thoughts on Jessica Alba where he can't pick his jaw up from the floor basically drooling all over himself.  I'm a huge shark fan (think I stated that before) and there are many scenes where sharks are present which the actors say was a big attraction and scary point about being in the movie, especially Scott Caan.  The doc is worth seeing because it really has nothing to do with the overall plot of the film and the actors seem to be having more fun during it.  I'd give it a C+.

- Jessie