Wednesday, October 24, 2007

RtW 2007 Halloween Special



It's the one that started it all, the 2007 Review the World Halloween Special! Not only is this the first Halloween Special, it's the first time that Brian and Tim host together! Many good things are reviewed and covered including decorations, candy, a Creepy Crawlers machine, and one of the last appearances of RAP SNACKS~!

Friday, October 19, 2007

Mountain Dew Gamer Fuel


Put down the video game controller and grab a bib because the purveyors of sugary soda Mountain Dew are bringing our nation’s largest sector of virgins and vagrants their very own drink.  Titled “Game Fuel”, it’s supposedly a mixture of cherry and citrus flavors, although neither is particularly discernable.


The can features the visage of Master Chief from Halo, and if they wanted to sell more of this, they could have likely marketed it as the beloved character’s piss, and surely diehard fans would have clamored to pour it down their throats.


If you’re serious about the drink itself, and not the hoopla surrounding it, I’d suggest drinking it in a chilled glass with ice.  You could attack it straight from the can, but I found it more refreshing, and a much better accompaniment to food when done the aforementioned way.

My own family members worship at the altar of Master Chief.

In closing, do your best to help the masses of Halo fanatics out there.  My brother (and cousin, both pictured) is amongst the group who logs countless hours of his life away nightly.  We can make a difference.  It’s with that very hope in mind I declare today “Take A Halo Addict On A Trip Day!”  I don’t care if you take them to the park, a long drive, a bakery, or Bed, Bath, and Beyond… just do whatever it takes.

Overall Grade: C+ 

Monday, October 8, 2007

Freek – Evil Energy – Psycho drink


I gave this a C+ because if nothing else, it deserved some credit for being bizarre.  The concept of cashing in on the energy drink phenomenon is one we’ve all likely seen firsthand.  But this, wow, it really takes the cake for one of the more creative imitators.  The brand is Freek, their slogan apparently, “Evil Energy,” and their mascot, a gray deformed face belonging to some ungodly creature.  The flavor I purchased was Psycho, their orange-flavored energy drink, and there’s also Skitzo, Rage, Maniac, Screem, and dare I forget Thrill Her.


 The reason for the lower grade is mostly due to taste.  This, to me, tastes like an energy drink that’s been siphoned through a sweaty gym teacher’s sock, which happened to be filled with Warheads candy.  The orange wasn’t an afterthought, which I dug, as a lot of generic energy drinks claim a particular flavor, only to ultimately disappoint.  But, as my unusual metaphor above suggests, this thing was sour and way too tart.  Trying to eat this with food would definitely not be recommended.

Well, I thought my job here was done, until I stumbled upon the official Freek website.  Take a look at this shit:


I don’t even have to tell you how utterly ridiculous this is!  I’m serious, this is actually from their corporate website.  I had to superimpose two images together, but this is all right from Freek headquarters.  Each flavor has their own bio describing their distinctive individual personality.  Psycho is “your Mother’s worst Nightmare and your sister’s bad boy crush”?  Wait, so, you’re saying he’s a date rapist with tattoos?  But, lest we forget his softer side, Psycho “enjoys breeding guinea pigs in his down time.”

This is too surreal to comprehend right now.  As outrageous as this is, these guys are doing something right.  Any company who takes time to Photoshop kneepads on a soft drink can is one that I’m totally down with.

Overall Grade: C+ 

Monday, October 1, 2007

Lotus Blossom Cafe (Epcot)


Epcot, like the other Disney parks, has lots of dining choices.  Epcot hosts the World Showcase, too; meaning there’s food from 11 different countries available so narrowing down a choice isn’t always easy.  One key thing to keep in mind is that there are essentially three types of places to get food.  The first category is small kiosks and stands, where you can get a quick bite to eat, the second category is your more reasonably priced sit-down restaurants, some using the cafeteria line method showcased in a few of my earlier Disney restaurant reviews, and then lastly, the nicer higher-priced upscale dining establishments.   Lotus Blossom Cafe falls into the second category, and is right nearby Nine Dragons, one of the aforementioned expensive places.  Lotus’ menu contains only a handful of items and is ideal for lunch or to get some fuel to keep your park trekking energy up.

We went to Lotus Blossom Cafe on our first Disney visit in ’06.  The pictures above are from our first trip.  The food was uniformly good, and in comparison to other, less expensive eateries the character of the food, people, and atmosphere here was more than enough to make it one of the only restaurants we made a return visit to on our second trip.


This time we both opted to get the Orange Chicken with steamed rice.  We had dinner reservations later that night and figured this would be a fun, quality lunch.  Chinese food has been bastardized by shopping malls and culturally plundered, but still in America, you can find both good and bad examples of it.  As far as mall and similar fare goes, Lotus’ Orange Chicken would rank up near the best that I’ve ever had.  It’s not fancy but rather simple and straightforward, but the taste is incredible, and the texture of the crispy chicken, thick, sweet sauce, and rice is unbelievably satisfying.


We tried what I believe they referred to as a “Choco Bubble Drink”, hoping it’d be similar to the boba tea phenomenon we’d recently been introduced to.  For the uninitiated, boba is generally little black round balls of tapioca that have a chewy texture, and are put in the bottom of tea and other beverages.  So, when you’re drinking, you’ll occasionally suck up a couple through your straw.  Writing it out sounds rather ridiculous, but when done correctly, it can be fun and quite addicting.  This beverage however was a pale imitation.  It tasted like generic chocolate milk, with crushed ice, and thin, rubbery square pieces that were their answer to boba.


A few small birds joined us for lunch.  I don’t think the employees were real thrilled we were feeding them bits of rice, but how could we refuse such delicate, beautiful creatures?


In closing, I really do enjoy Lotus Blossom Cafe.  I’ve been there twice, and next time I’m in Orlando, I’ll definitely be there again.  If there were a franchise of these and one was within driving distance, I’d make the trip regularly.  But, being that this is the only one, gives it so much more charm.  It’s located right in the heart of the China section of World Showcase, and really one of the best lunch options in all of Epcot.

Overall Grade: B+